Authoritarian Parenting, Permissive Parenting, or Loving Parenting
Excerpt : Angie was brought up by rigid, authoritarian parents who kept her on a tight leash. They rarely considered her feelings about anything, showing a complete lack of empathy and compassion for her
Angie was brought up by rigid, authoritarian parents who kept her on a tight leash. They rarely considered her feelings about anything, showing a complete lack of empathy and compassion for her feelings and desires. If she came home five minutes late from school or from an activity, she was punished. Yelling and hitting were their favorite forms of punishment.
Angie was a good girl. She did well in school and did what she was told, but was often sad and lonely and never felt important. When she married and had her own children, she knew that she didn’t want to treat her children the way she had been treated. She wanted to consider their feelings and needs. She wanted them to feel valued and important.
Angie was a very loving mother. She spent lots of time with her children, playing with them, listening to them, and giving them much affection and
 |
“ Black Belt
Parenting-The Art of Raising
your Child for
Success"
|
Also see :
Number 1 Key to Good Parenting
The numbers are chilling. Teen suicide and homicide rates have tripled from twenty years ago. There is a 50% increase in childhood obesity. Teenage pregnancy rates are the highest for any Western society. SAT scores have plummeted. 15-20% of...read more
Parenting - Balancing Control and Freedom
Parenting teenagers is challenging in the best of circumstances. This article discusses the balance between controlling what happens to your teen and letting go so that he/she may deal with the natural consequences of their behavior.
Insanity,...read more
|
approval. However, because it was so vital to Angie that her children feel valued and important, she often put herself aside and gave in to their demands. Because Angie had never felt important, it was easy to put herself aside. She actually believed that her children’s feelings and needs were more important than hers. As a result, Angie swung the other way from her own upbringing and became a permissive parent.
The consequences for Angie of authoritarian parenting was that she didn’t value herself. The results for her children of permissive parenting was that her children grew up with entitlement issues, thinking they were more important than others, and often not being caring and respectful toward others.
Neither authoritarian nor permissive parenting is loving parenting. Loving parenting is parenting that values both the parents’ and the children’s feelings
Also see :
Do You Know Your Parenting Style?
Want to be a better parent? Knowing what your current parenting style is will help you identify your needed areas for improvement. Promoting the self-discipline and self-esteem of the children in your family often requires an emotional juggling...read more
Mom vs. Dad: Navigating Parenting Differences With All Good Intentions
Let’s face it: raising children can be quite the adventure. Rewarding at one turn, challenging at the next – it’s the ultimate roller-coaster for the parenting thrill seeker. In the Game of Life, you rolled the dice and accepted the role of...read more
|
and needs. Loving parents do not attempt to control their children – other than in actual situations of health and safety - nor do they allow their children to control them. They do not violate their children with anger, blame, or hitting, nor do they allow their children to violate them. They do not expect their children to give themselves for others, nor do they give themselves up for their children.
Loving parents are parents who deeply value themselves enough to not worry about being rejected by their children. They are willing to set solid limits on unacceptable behavior and are not available to being manipulated by their children. Their identities are not tied into their children’s performance in school or in other activities, such as sports. Nor are their identities tied up in how their children look. They are accepting of who their children are as individuals, even
Also see :
PARENTING DILEMMAS: FINDING SUPPORT ONLINE
The role of being a parent is full of trials and tribulations. The good times are great, but the bad times can make you feel frustrated and lonely.
Friendly advice: to take it or not?
Confiding in friends and family about problems at home is...read more
Parenting---Roots and Wings
I’m sure many of you have heard that old Hallmark card adage that goes something like this: Parents give their children two great gifts---one is roots, the other is wings. This is what I address in this article. As parents, we pray for our...read more
|
when their children are very different from them. They do not impose their way of being onto their children, yet at the same time they solidly reinforce a value system that includes honesty, integrity, caring, compassion, kindness and empathy.
As much as we want to be loving parents, unless we have done our own inner work to heal our own deep fears of rejection and domination, we will automatically be acting out of these fears without being consciously aware of it. If you grew up with fears of rejection and/or domination, you will automatically protect against these fears in your relationships with your children. You may find yourself trying to control them out of a fear of being controlled or rejected by them. You might be controlling with your anger or with your giving in and giving yourself up. Fears of rejection can manifest with children through trying to control them
Also see :
Parenting Strategy, One of the Worst Ever!
Some parents rush to serve every squeak and squawk from their kids. "I can't let my child feel pain!" said one dad. Parents, if you are giving way too much, find out why your parenting strategy may be one of the worst strategies ever.
I...read more
Parenting Styles - Overcoming Your Differences
If you spend any time in the parenting section of the library or
your local bookstore, you will find hundreds of books on
disciplining and raising your children. All the leading experts
have their own ideas about what works and what doesn't. As...read more
|
with anger, or through trying to control their love through giving yourself up to them. Fears of domination can manifest through controlling them with anger or violence to avoid being controlled by them. Insecurities can manifest through attempting to get your children to perform in the way you want in order to define your worth.
In one way or another, whatever is unhealed within you will surface in your behavior with your children. Raising healthy children means first healing the wounded child within you – the part of you that has your fears and insecurities, and your desire to protect against rejection and domination.
Our society has swung back and forth between authoritarian and permissive parenting and the result of both is far less than desirable. We have only to look at the number of people taking antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs, as well as the
number of alcoholics and drug addicts, as well as the rise of crime and the number of people in prisons, to know that neither method works to raise healthy individuals.
Perhaps it is time to accept that we need to be in the process of healing ourselves before becoming parents.
Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including "Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?" She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: http://www.innerbonding.com or mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available. margaret@innerbonding.com
 |
Revolutionary 'Mom Has Fun' Parenting
Method For Raising Happy Well-Behaved Kids!
|
More Parenting Articles
PARENTING DILEMMAS: FINDING SUPPORT ONLINE
The role of being a parent is full of trials and tribulations. The good times are great, but the...
Parenting - The Irrational Vocation
There are some grounds to assume that a cognitive dissonance is involved in feeling that...
Practical Parenting Advice
|
sitemap
copyright www.parentingadvices.com 2006
Warning: include() [function.include]: URL file-access is disabled in the server configuration in /home/parentin/public_html/php/footer.php on line 19
Warning: include(http://www.ultrasonicspabath.com/adsenselogger.inc) [function.include]: failed to open stream: no suitable wrapper could be found in /home/parentin/public_html/php/footer.php on line 19
Warning: include() [function.include]: Failed opening 'http://www.ultrasonicspabath.com/adsenselogger.inc' for inclusion (include_path='.:/usr/lib/php:/usr/local/lib/php') in /home/parentin/public_html/php/footer.php on line 19
|
Recently Added Parenting Articles
Is bad parenting responsible for kids that go bad?
As much as we may hear about a "bad seed" child or a child that
was "born bad" as an explanation for why a child of good parents
goes terribly wrong in preadolescent or adolescent years,
children are not (cannot be) born bad. The reason, simply,...read more
Parenting: Strategies to Get Your Baby to Sleep
As with most aspects of parenting, you're sure to come across a wide variety of opinions about baby's sleep! Friends, relatives and others have their views on how much sleep babies need, the best sleep routines and more.
Here are some practical...read more
Parenting Teens: The Future
A look at a possible alternative for our future.
In the future, parents won't send their teenagers off to summer camp or junior high. The states came up with a better plan. On a child's 12 1/2 birthday, Mom and Dad would help him pack his bag...read more
Share Your Thoughts About Parenting
Submit your best essay
ParentingIssues.org Writing Contest
Do you have a talent for putting your thoughts on paper?
Enter the ParentingIssues "Memories, Lessons & Advice" writing contest!
Write a (minimum)500 word essay about being...read more
Parenting 20-Something Kids...Still?
Aren’t we through with our parenting duties by the time our kids are 20-somethings? The truth is, we are still mom and dad but the change is in the way we do our jobs. What we used to do as parents of teen-agers no longer works in the...read more
Five Ways To Turbo-Boost Your Parenting Skills
The 'phone conversation had nothing at all to do with parenting - but it made me think . . . 'Hello, Eastbank Football Club. Can I help you?' 'Good morning, may I speak with the Assistant Coach, please?' 'Oh, I'm sorry. He's still...read more
Parenting
This article on parenting is by a practicing relationship counsellor/therapist, and father. The following suggestions will be useful for any parent or caregiver who wants to improve their relationships with their children. In more extreme...read more
Parenting After Divorce
Once you have finished gathering all your divorce information, sought all the divorce advice that was out there, found divorce help by hiring an attorney and financial planner… after you have learned everything there is to know about how to get a...read more
UP TO YOUR NECK IN PARENTING DOGMA-DOO? Step into something more personally-correct-- 7 WARNING SIGNS THAT BIG MOTHER IS WATCHING
WHO’S MAKING YOUR PARENTING DECISIONS?
You… or the Mommy Police?
The Mommy Police? They’re just a fiction--an adult version of the Bogey Man, aren’t they?
Well, maybe they don’t actually inhabit the bodies of the living dead like your...read more
MORAL ARMOR'S Irrational Parenting, Part V
Copyright 2005 Ronald E Springer
Setting a Bad Example.
Their illogical banter is all driven by neurotic denial—one of the most horrific traits to hand down. When reality is faked, everyone is betrayed. When an issue of life cannot be faced,...read more
Some News About Parenting
- Positive parenting helps prevent obesity in kids
Washington, Feb 7 (IANS) Positive parenting during the child's formative years could help prevent obesity among them.
- Parenting Advice That Also Applies to Entrepreneurship
I've learned a lot about parenting from being an entrepreneur and vice versa. I detailed some of my lessons a few months ago here. I'm a big fan of crossover advice and transferable lessons. Really, who wants to have to learn the same thing twice? During a recent conversation that I had with a few ...
- Parenting expert takes brain-centric approach
A psychologist known for his expertise on how brain science can inform better parenting will visit Columbia this week as part of an effort to highlight important discoveries about children’s brain development.
-
Positive Parenting.
Developing discipline without yelling, spanking, nagging, or time-outs!
-
Parenting Book.
1 resource for parenting skills.
-
Better
Behavior Wheel Parenting Tool.
An upbeat, fun parenting tool for parents wishing to manage their behavior
challenged kids.
-
Parenting Agreements (Plans)
Everything you need to know about Parenting Agreement/Plans includes a detailed
fill-in Parenting Agreement.
-
Divorce-Parenting.
eBook, online seminar, free advice.
-
Potty
Training Helpline.
Get personal answers to your potty training and parenting questions from Dr.
Sonna.
-
More Fun
- Less Work Parenting Method.
New curiosity based system dissolves power struggles, tantrums, whining. Turns
kids into happy cooperative family team members.
-
Practical Parenting Advice.
Free parenting advice and support on children's behaviour.
-
Parenting Secrets By Mother Of Five.
Raising Kids With Life Skills makes both parenting and growing up easier to do.
-
ParentingToolbox Membership Site.
Parenting, anger, depression, divorce.
-
Parenting
Book - How To Parent Together!
Parenting book by parent / child relationship expert helps parents with
discipline, step parenting & blended family issues.
|